Have I always been so different? I don't judge. It just occurred to me, I never have, at least based on superficial appearances or odd behavior because I myself am odd. If I don't like a person it's usually because said party has wronged me in some way. Was I always this way? Is this a selfish way of looking at the world, that I don't take other peoples opinions or confirmed facts about a person to heart.

I am also a very angry indivual ( yes I know that's mispelled). There are things in my past that influence behavior today. How much of that though is genetic? Extra testosterone, or maybe a delightful swing towards just being fucking pissed off. Who knows.

I could reflect all day about my inner motivations and artistic toils. I got told today I haven't improved my artistic sty lings since beginning at this place. Granted it was only from a TA and not from my teacher(s) themselves. My main studio teacher gave me a glowing review. He was kind of quiet in the beginning. Very nice guy once he settled in and was able to pick up better on his students. I don't why but he reminded me of my old illustration teacher back in Michigan, and I mentioned him to him and well.. what do you know. They graduated same class at Cornell. Small world ftw. I would've liked to have had that teacher exlusively, classtime and homework and all because I found living up to two teachers expectations kind of... well.. ridiculous. Homework for one, then classtime for the other. Go figure, my classtime teach was only brought on to help homework teacher with his workload or at least that's the guess through the student grapevine.

Anyway. If all goes according to the financial aid plan I've got color next semester! Whoo! Maybe I can get over my hang ups about using it and actually improve in that area. One thing I really wanted to do and they save it for semester number two.

Cross your fingers kiddies.

Ohh yes.. for that scanner too,that I've been not very subtly hinting at for christmas. Ohh the art I could do then.

I hope I did well.